Solomonster

Radical Vixen is a "kinky hippie activist who talks dirty on the phone."  She's a phone sex operator, and her blog is quite an entertaining read.  In this posting, she describes how different kinds of men sound when they orgasm:

The Sounds of Cumming

I hear a lot of guys cum. Over the years I’ve noticed how certain types of people tend to cum in similar ways. My observances:

Adult babies tend to cum quiet and cum quick. The build up may last for hours-mind you it takes time to change a diaper-but when the orgasm hits they’re usually only good for a couple of moans before they’re done.

Doggie boys often bark when they cum. I hear more big dog barks rather than little dog whimpers.

I like to order bondage lovers to use a ball gag when they masterbate. They ‘mmphf’ ‘mmphf’ when the big O hits.

Guys that are hard up for a release pant at the end. They gasp for breath afterwards, like they’ve been holding in their orgasm for weeks. (some have)

Shy men who whisper thru the whole call often perk up at the end. The sounds of their orgasm tends to be the loudest sound they make the whole time we’re talking. Immediately after they whisper a goodbye and hang up.

British men sound dignified when they cum, almost poetic.

Cum sluts are fun to listen to when they climax. They moan and moan and moan. And then moan some more. Their moans are almost campy, like they’re trying out for an Orgasm Oscar. I often turn down my phone volume while they’re going.

Incest callers often whimper when they cum. Sometimes they whine “mommmmy” too.

Southern men tend to sound gruff when cumming. Their moans sound gravely.

Some guys give a loud puff when they spurt. Then they immediately start talking about their day as if we didn’t just have a steamy conversation. (I enjoy this because it’s fascinating to find out about the rest of their lives.)

Elderly men have a recovery time after orgasm where they catch their breath and rest a bit. They tend to grunt and wheeze as they squirt.

The toughest orgasms are performed by the guys who want to eat their own jizz. After the orgasm hits the desire to eat their sperm fades quickly. So they have to eat their cum while still in the act of cumming. They definitely have good coordination considering they need to hold the phone, stroke their cock, scoop up the cum and eat it while continuing the stroking to keep cumming. Add to this the act of directing the sperm so as not to stain the sheets for wifey to see and you could have a new Olympic event. Extra credit should be awarded for not dropping, or cumming on, the phone.

posted by Charlie  # 12/08/2005 02:20:00 PM